


before i go (glory)

by space_dev



Series: it isn't fair and it isn't right (to lead you on like it's alright) [2]
Category: Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Angst, Death, Gen, Sadness, aka the holy trinity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-11
Updated: 2018-04-11
Packaged: 2019-04-21 13:22:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14285820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/space_dev/pseuds/space_dev
Summary: Accompaniment to It Will Be Painless, about the boxes.





	before i go (glory)

**Author's Note:**

> _one song_  
>  glory  
> one song  
> before i go  
> glory 
> 
>  
> 
> One Song Glory- RENT

Her box was made of Mandalorian Kurshi'Aalar, a tree that grew only on Mandalore. 

 

Ursa had shown Sabine her own box when she was nine, shortly after they'd reforged her armour together, shown her the necklace she'd get if Ursa died in battle, and gave Sabine an axe to cut down a Kurshi'Aalar and the tools to forge her own box.

 

She'd painted it Majorelle Blue, Imperial Shade Number 66025, and put her Mand'bor Russ in it for Tristan (Magic Rock in Basic, it was a protection stone that in legend protected young children, the elderly, and the pure of heart, it was a conduit for the gods to put their magic through to steer her to safety, but she was too old for it now that she had armour) a puzzle made of little bits of metal attached together on hinges that she spray-painted for her father, and a folded bird for her mother.

 

Later, when she left the academy, she nearly left it, but grabbed it as an afterthought, and added a choker with a sing,e charm made of recycled stormtrooper armour, cut in the shape of her newly perfected starbird and painted orange, and when Ketsu attacked her, the box was in her pack. Ketsu opened the pack, took any and all valuables from her, but left her blasters and box. 

 

Ketsu was Mandalorian too, she knew that a warrior had to die with her box and weapons, or the gods wouldn't take her in.

 

When Hera and Kanan and Zeb and Chopper found her and stitched up her wounds, when she decided to stay with them, she added a Kar'ta Choruk for Hera (a Mandalorian stone that protected loved ones after the death of its owner; another conduit but this one for all ages and people.) a kyber crystal magnet with her starbird on it for Kanan, a small woven mat of the leaves of the same Kurshi'Aalar that had made the box for Zeb, the tree's leaves were long, skinny, impossibly strong, and lasted nearly forever, rendering them perfect for weaving, she'd brought it to the Academy to remind her of Krownest and Ketsu hadn't taken it, and a magnet decal with the starbird on it for Chopper.

When Ezra, a laughing, happy ball of _light_ and _innocence_ joined, she'd stolen the Phantom during the night cycle, snuck onto Mandalore, and found a Mand'bor Russ for Ezra. It was deep blue, it had little silver sparkles imbedded in it, and it _glowed,_ it meant that it wanted Ezra, that it was _meant_ for Ezra, so it was perfect for him. Nobody ever even found out she'd stolen the Phantom, or what she'd done with it.

After Malachor, his pure heart had turned colder, his light snuffed out, and she considered getting him something else, but when she snuck in his room one night, pressed it to his palm, it still glowed. It was still there for him.

She considered leaving it in there for him, he sure needed it, but she took it back to the box while it still glowed brilliantly.

 

Now that he was gone, she's never forgiven herself for not leaving it with him that night.

 

* * *

 

 

He saw her one day, putting a weird glowing sparkly blue rock into a small wooden box, muttering a Mandalorian prayer, something about life, death, and the in-between, touching the earrings and putting them in, followed by everything else that had been in the box, a prayer and a touch, a whisper and a soft, sad tear, the name of the person it belonged to.

He ducked back into the hall before she saw him.

That night, before they left Lothal for Atollon, he made a box out of the wood of a Jkonlaer tree, a tree native to Lothal with tough, waterproof wood and vines instead of leaves, in hyperspace he scrounged through his belongings for things to put in. The arm for Chopper. The mug for Zeb. The necklace for Hera. The drawings and the vines for Sabine, the magnet for Kanan.

Lothal has its own religion, a secret to all but the natives and the _Uii Lothilia'aans_ , non-natives who were essentially adopted by the natives and introduced to the religion, to the Lothilian language for the religion and for use when you don't want the Republic, later the Seperatists, later the Empire, to understand.

It teaches many things, and one is for the dead to leave gifts for their family, to celebrate mixed heritage if they have it.

Ezra always wishes he had his tattoos, when he was small and watched his mother tattooing his older sister, he thought, _I want tattoos someday._

He'd picked out a design, too; one on the end of each eyebrow, one on his nose, and later, one by each side of his eye to honour his sister with her tattoos all around her own bright blue eyes.

So now as he's putting the stuff in, he does the same as Sabine; a prayer, a touch, and later he feels a deep sadness, all day long, but the next morning it's gone, and he's somehow freed of the sadness of finding out his parents died.

Later, there's a gift for Ashoka added, a little green kyber crystal he finds one day and never mentioned it to anyone, and in a few short weeks she's dead, Kanan's blind, he wouldn't be able to see the magnet anyway if he died, why would Kanan want something from him, why would he even _care_ if he died?

And anyway, _Em'annj Lothilia'aan_ , which literally translates to Lothilian Religion but really means Lothilian Teachings, say that if someone who was to receive a gift in the box died, they should use that gift for good.

He does use it for good, at least, he hopes he does; he makes a lightsaber out of it since his is gone.

And he felt a little happiness, swears he felt Ashoka brushing his mind like a ghost, her _proudness,_ her _acceptance,_ as he ignites the blade for the first time.

Now that he's gone, he wishes he'd been able to stay, he knows he could've saved Ashoka had he lived a _little_  longer, but she tells him that _it's okay, it doesn't matter, there's no point in holding onto guilt and sadness here._

So there's a prayer, a soft touch, tears of air that leave as quickly as they enter, and now, he can be _happy_.

 


End file.
